Right now my mind has been stuck on the right now…and causing myself probably more grief than necessary. I am trying to think long term and that the feelings I have right now wont last always. Its hard because everyday it hurts but I cant live this way. I have to believe there is a brighter day set to return. The brightness that I am used to. This sadness and gloom is wearing me down. I truly feel like I am on the outside looking in on my own life. I hate it. Moving isnt going to make me happy. Staying isnt going to make me happy. I am struggling to find happy again….

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